Rockabye Baby!

The below mentioned product(s) was/were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

When my kids were born, the only lullaby music available came by way of my voice or a windup music box. There were kids songs I found on CD, but none that really worked to sooth and calm my kids. They always ended up singing or playing when they should have been sleeping. I ended up using one of those white noise makers with the ocean sounds on the rough nights.

Earlier this fall I was approached by Christina (Hi Christina!) at Rockabye Baby! about reviewing a CD of rock music that has been made into lullabies. I will admit it, I was skeptical. Rock as a lullaby? Get out. I didn’t know such a thing existed or that it would even sound good. While my children are 9 and 12, I still said I was curious and wanted to give it a try. My 12 year old still listens to her Elmo CDs so I figured she would be an easy target to listen and give me her honest opinion too, in case I wasn’t a fan.

Truth be told, I was surprised. Surprised at how well the Lullaby Renditions of Queen sounded. It was Good with a capital G. I was afraid it would sound like the old midi files we all had when the internet first came out. (I’m not a fan of the midi anything, which was part of my skepticism). The upside to getting the Queen CD was two fold; a) I love Queen and know almost every song; and b) I’ve made my kids listen to my Greatest Hits CD so often, they know all the songs too! It was great to sit together and listen for a minute until we could identify each song. The CD reminded me (and I’m totally dating myself here) of the old television program Name that Tune, and in this particular instance, I totally rocked it.

I really enjoyed hearing the music that Wayne and Garth used to head bang to, being revised and rendered in such a soft and peaceful manner. The CD does Freddie proud. My 12 year old won’t give the CD back. She has claimed it as her own.

Another great thing about Rockabye Baby lullaby music is that you can download the music onto a card and listen to mp3 clips on the website. They offer lullaby renditions of 25 different artists ranging from The Beatles to Nirvana. Most recently they have released the Lullaby Renditions of Aerosmith which features liner notes by Steven Tyler. We also just launched a new product that we are super excited about that is a download card.

For more information and mp3 clips, visit their website www.rockabyebabymusic.com.

Crazy Love - Michael Buble

The below mentioned product(s) was/were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

Warner Bros Records has asked me to review the newest Michael Bublé CD, Crazy Love.

The official word from Warner Bros is this:

'Crazy Love', Michael Bublé's first CD in two and a half years, features two original songs along with his always original take on 11 standards from various eras. The multi-Grammy winning artist hunkered down in recording studios in LA, Brooklyn, New York and his hometown of Vancouver for the last six months to make his 'ultimate record about the inevitable roller coaster ride of relationships.' The first single, 'Haven't Met You Yet,' written by Bublé (with Alan Chang and Amy Foster) is scheduled to be released to radio on August 31st. Additional tunes on the album include 'Cry Me A River,' 'You're Nobody Till Somebody Loves You,' 'Georgia On My Mind' and 'Baby (You've Got What It Takes)' which was performed with Sharon Jones and The Dap-Kings. The title song is a cover of the Van Morrison gem 'Crazy Love.' The CD closes out with a haunting version of 'Stardust' which is performed with the acapella group Naturally 7. The album was produced by David Foster, Bob Rock and Humberto Gatica.

I have listened to the CD over and over this week while cleaning my house and doing my homework and cooking dinner and I love it. Sometimes I don’t really care for a particular cover of a song coughMr. & Mrs. Jonescough, however, I can say that his cover on this CD of Heartache Tonight and All of Me are two of the best I have heard in a long time. IMHO of course. I was going to put the CD in the car so I could listen on my way to work but I can’t keep it out of my daughter’s room long enough. If she was older, she would probably be one of those weird stalker fans. She has a photo collage on her nightstand of various Michael Bublé CD covers, flowers and a wedding ring. I’m not sure exactly where she’s going with that. She is only 12 after all. I'll be broke if she ever finds out there is an official Michael Bublé website.

Warner Bros has also authorized a contest. YEAH! WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER! I will be giving away FIVE Crazy Love CDs to FIVE lucky winners. The CDs are valued at $18.98 each. The only catch is, wait! There is no catch!

The Rules:

“The Michael Bublé ‘Crazy Love’ CD giveaway is open to participants with a United States mailing address only (international readers can enter if they have a friend in the States who can accept their prizes by mail.”

To Enter:

Leave a comment (including a VALID email address) here telling me your favorite Michael Bublé song and bingo presto, you’re entered. Get an extra entry for each Twitter, Facebook or blog post about the contest. Just leave a separate link for each extra entry. The contest will run until midnight, November 7, 2009, when comments will close and winners will be randomly chosen.

Tide you have made me sad.

In the past, I have used Tide laundry soap AND Downy fabric softener and when I pulled my laundry out of the dryer, it smelled delicious AND it didn’t cling to me like dog hair. Did I mention that it smelled delicious? You see, I like a laundry soap/fabric softener that can really smell up my laundry room. I want it to SMELL like I am doing laundry, hours after I am done. When I climb out of the pool, I want my towel to smell like it just came out of the dryer. When I crawl into bed, I want it to smell like I just washed the sheets.

Well, when I started school again, I began really multi-tasking my life. The result was on laundry day, 8 out of 10 times, I forgot to add the Downy. Which totally happens if you do loads of laundry between writing papers and reading hundreds of pages of psychology. That is when I started using dryer sheets. Because I could remember the dryer sheets. Just not the Downy. (I don’t get it either). For a while I was using the Bounce dryer sheets. The regular scent makes me sneeze so I tried the unscented and they were just bla. My laundry didn’t have that feel good, just cleaned smell. Then I tried the Bounce with Febreze and thought I had died and gone to laundry heaven. My clothes smelled good. My laundry room smelled good. I found a winning combination and didn’t have static cling! This is important for several reasons: dog hair, carpet, multiple electronic machines in my house, working on the computer day and night, dog hair, etc.

As my tale of woe would go, the local stores here in the sticks stopped carrying the Bounce with Febreze.

There was some national conspiracy against me having smell good laundry.

I tried other Bounce products but they all made me sneeze. I had to go back to the unscented Bounce and that made me and my laundry very sad. I tried the Tide with Febreze and it worked okay, but it wasn't quite the same. Then of course, when I got my new he washer and dryer, I could not for the life of me find Tide he with Febreze.

Another conspiracy, I’m certain.

About a week ago, I found that Tide now has a touch of Downy. (I don't get out much) The skies opened up and angels sang the praises of this new find. I found the solution to my prayers, Tide WITH Downy?! The best of both words, combined? Halleluiah, Halleluiah! I would never have to remember to add the Downy again? Saweet!

Except. Today was laundry day. The first day of using the new Tide with a Touch of Downy. What a downer. Really. Generally, I am a Tide girl. All Tide. All the time. Right now, I’m cranky. I just shocked myself no less than six times while pulling my static electricity filled laundry out of the dryer. Perhaps it is my own fault. I naturally assumed that I could use my new Tide/Downy combination and not have to use a dryer sheet too. Apparently I was wrong. There was underwear stuck to The Man’s tee shirts. There were lint bunnies all over my dish towels. There was static to the degree that my hair is very, very alive right now and all I did was carry the towels from the laundry room to the linen closet (and I might have cradled them on my head while I rearranged some misplaced stuff in the closet but that is totally beside the point).

The point is, I really expected more from my Tide with a Touch of Downy. Maybe they should have added a LOT of Downy or mentioned on the bottle that there was an insufficient amount of Downy so as to negate the use of a dryer sheet. I don't think that is too much to ask.

Unmentionables? Not any more?

Okay, so. Now that I’ve started to lose a little weight, I can see the difference in my clothes. Mostly my pants in the leg and thigh area. Also a little in the waist, although not as much as I would like. I still see my waist as that of someone three months pregnant. Husband says it is not that bad. I say, what does he know? Anyway, now that I can finally see some results, I am slightly more motivated to keep working to lose the other 27 pounds (because 40 is my goal) and that will put me back at pre-marriage weight of 148 lbs. I also weighed 148 lbs when I got pregnant. Both times. Weird. Moving on. With my new results, I’m thinking I need some new underwear.

I know, borderline T.M.I., but hey, you know me. Filter: none. Why just share when I can over share. Right?

Anyway, I’ve been looking for something new. I don’t want some old granny panties. I don’t want standard bikinis. I have never liked the French cut because they always end up where they don’t belong. I have thongs (or butt floss as I refer to them) and I am thinking I like the new boy cut undies. You know, the ones that look kind of like a guys swim trunk. My foster kids used to wear a wide range of briefs and jockeys and even men’s bikinis and I always thought man boy underwear were comfortable in a way that women's were not. (Husband won’t touch anything trendy or with words on the waist. I think it give him flashbacks of kindergarten).

Anyway, I just found out that Diesel makes women’s undies and I’ll be damned if they aren’t just cute. Not Strawberry Shortcake or Sponge Bob cute, but sexy cute. Now I have to resign myself that those undies will look just as cute on me one day as they do a twenty-something co-ed. Think happy thoughts. Think happy thoughts.

Daniel X - Watch the Skies

The below mentioned product(s) was/were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

I will admit, I have not read the first Daniel X book, The Dangerous Days of Daniel X, written by James Patterson and Michael Ledwidge. From the likes of the second book, Daniel X, Watch the Skies, written by Patterson and Ned Rust, I think that I can chalk that up as my loss.

I have been a long time fan of Patterson and I loved his books ever since picking up When the Wind Blows, the book that first introduces us to one of my favorite characters, Max. I wondered if Daniel X would remind me of Max, and I was pleasantly surprised that he did not. Instead, Daniel reminds me of my three little brothers.

Daniel is a teenager, full of raging hormones and quirkiness, but the thing that makes Daniel different from the average teenager is that he is in fact, wait for it… alien. But, he is a good alien. He has the ability to perform wicked awesome feats such as create friends from his imagination, smell alien sweat from 10 miles away, control minds and did I mention that he can blow fire (or spit wads) from his fingertip? In his spare time, Daniel hunts aliens. The bad ones.

In Watch the Skies, Daniel is hunting Number 5 and his pals, who have decided that they must exterminate all humans on earth. Seems like a lofty goal to me but hey, it’s fiction. Daniel and his crew of imaginary friends come to life, including a new girl interest, Judy Blue Eyes, are geared up and ready for battle.

Daniel, much like my little brothers, is full of sarcasm, imagination and raging teenage hormones (like the time that he and Judy Blue Eyes have a make out session in the bushes in front of the alien infested television station). The way Daniel is constantly getting out of class, using his imaginary mom who gives her okie dokie with various excuses, is ingenious and my brothers would have killed for this ability!

What I appreciate most about this book is that it made my daughter want to read the first one. While the book appears to be geared toward the tweenaged boy, my nine year old daughter loved it! She is totally into explosions, sarcasm, and gross. This book is full of all three. The chapters are short enough that she didn’t feel overwhelmed at reading them and as I warned her, the book is a page turner. She read it in under a week which may be a record for her. She is letting her friend, “who is a boy, but not a boy friend” read it next.

I would recommend Watch the Skies to girls and boys, especially of the 9-11 age. This is a story about a boy who hunts aliens, using his imagination as his greatest tool. As parents, we cannot foster the use of imagination enough in our children, it is helpful to have a book that nudges the idea along.

Zing Zang Zoom!

Tickets to the below mentioned program were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

Did I tell you we went to the circus? Of course I didn’t because I just pulled this post out of my saved DRAFT folder. Apparently I wrote it, saved it so I could download the pictures and then promptly forgot all about it. (Sorry Lauren)!

I’ll tell you, this was probably one of the best circus acts I’ve ever seen, and we have seen plenty. This year we saw the Zing Zang Zoom show and it was the best I can recall.

My 12 year old was busy trying to figure out how the magic worked, exactly. My 9 year old was trying to figure out what to watch and when and how those people were walking around upside down!

My husband and I were in awe that the show was so much more captivating for our whole family this time around. What we wanted to know the most was if the two women being shot out of cannons would be cramming their heads through the roof because they shot FAST!



I love the tension that comes with the big cats and the goofiness of the clowns and the athleticism of the aerial acrobats.

However, my favorite part is always the elephants. Something about them makes the circus real for me. I love when they do tricks and stand on each other.They make the circus magic for me. Thank you Mom Central for the opportunity!

This is the post where you shake your head and say TMI* Woman, TMI

The below mentioned product(s) was/were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

I was approached by Mom Central with a request to blog about a certain body issue that many, many people encounter. Even I have suffered from this particular pain in the, er, uh moving on.

There is no way to gently transition into it. Today my friends, we are talking about hemorrhoids. Now, when I was pregnant the first time, all those years ago, I didn’t know what an external hemorrhoid was (except that my step-dad used to call all of my brothers one). I would have never dreamed that some day I would have my very own hemorrhoid. I just remember seeing blood one day and that my, well, I was itchy. Back there. I almost posted a picture of an offending hemorrhoid (not mine of course), but I decided against it. You can thank me later.

I waddled off to the next doctor appointment and I said Doc, I have an issue. My OBGYN, who also delivered my four youngest brothers and sisters and two of my cousins, knew my family well and he said “I’ve got a tissue for your issue.”

Good thing he went into medicine instead of comedy. Just sayin.

I explained my dilemma and he immediately knew what the problem was. He explained what could cause hemorrhoids (excessive pushing and pressure when going number two, constipation, pressure from the pregnancy and even diarrhea). I remember thinking to myself I did not sign up for this when I said “Hey Honey! Let’s have a baby!” My doc suggested a few things, an ointment for the itching, drinking more water, less straining when I tried to go and adding more fiber to my diet.

I was cured!

However, the next time I got pregnant, it was like I was reliving the same nightmare, just earlier in the game. I immediately went to the store and found the coolest product (no pun intended). I found some Tucks medicated wipes. They were in a small round tin and did they do the job. They cooled and soothed at the same time. I liked them much better than I did the ointment because, well, I’ll spare you the details but suffice it to say wiping off with a medicated wipe is better than spreading on an ointment and then walking around. Nuff said.

I share this embarrassment because you are my friend and I am not selfish. Because we’re all adults here. We’ve all had an embarrassing issue once or twice and sometimes, simply being the mom (or becoming one) opens doors to embarrasment we've yet to experience and products and information we would have never dreamed of knowing or learning or reading about on the internets. I wish someone had been around to tell me the tips and tricks of getting through pregnancy. It might have been that much more pleasurable.

* Too Much Information

Pantene Full & Thick

This is a compensated review from BlogHer and Pantene Full & Thick

Anyone who reads my blog will recall that I have been struggling with hair issues for quite some time. Earlier this year, my hair and I had a standoff of sorts. I said “hair, I’m tired of your wispy ways and limpness. I am tired of looking like an old washed out mop. I want the hair I used to have. I want hair that looks like hair and not faded Christmas tinsel. I know you can do it!” Yet, even with the pep talks and various products, my hair was having no part of it. I tried different shampoos and conditioners. I tried washing my hair every day and that didn’t even help. I was considering a perm and the flashback to my 80s hair almost made me cry. I just wanted a little body, some appearance of thickness. Mostly, I wanted my hair to look like it was not pasted to the top of my head by the middle of the day.

I went through a myriad of shampoos and conditions and even went to the doctor to ask if my age and hormone levels could be the root cause (ha!) of my hair problems. It seemed that when I turned the big Four-OH! last year, my hair decided it had had enough and began to limp out, break off and otherwise boycott all efforts I made at prettiness. As luck would have it in the midst of my hair product experimentation, BlogHer approached me with this review.

I had already tried five different shampoos since the first of the year, working my way down the list of suggestions my readers had provided earlier. When my Pantene arrived, the first thing I did was open it and take a smell. I like a shampoo that smells good but not heavily perfumed. Pantene smelled very light and fragrant but not overpowering. I washed my hair that night and was surprised that the shampoo is clear. I am not sure what I expected, but it wasn’t clear shampoo. I also like the fact that I only needed a small amount to clean my hair with a head full of bubbly lather. I conditioned and was surprised at the difference I felt simply combing it out. The true test would be the morning when I woke up. Usually, if I wash my hair at night, when I wake up in the morning it is limp and thin. However, the miracle of Pantene Full & Thick was that my hair actually had some fullness and thickness to it the next morning! Even better? My hair still looked good that night!

I was hesitant though to love this new Pantene Full & Thick just yet. I still had another day of hair to deal with. I used Pantene again and decided to blow dry my hair. Wow. Note to self: no need to hang my head upside down to blow dry it using Pantene. Yeah. I had big 80s hair that was, well, big. I had to tame it back just a little with some water. However, again, I was able to go two full days without washing my hair and that is huge for me.

I decided to wash both of my daughters’ hair with the Pantene Full & Thick. This was comical at best. My 12 year old has really thick, full hair. This shampoo gave her a full on lion’s mane. Not the look she was going for at all! My 9 year old has thin, wispy hair like mine. Her hair was beautiful and full of body and bounce. She is hooked and asked if I could buy her some Pantene for “just her.”

I have been using the Pantene Full & Thick all week and I honestly have no complaints. My hair looks good. It feels good. It has more body than it has had in over a year and it is not breaking off. It even smells good the next day and is easy to comb through.

If you have thin or limp hair like I did, I would feel totally comfortable recommending Pantene Full & Thick. I also appreciate the fact that the conditioner is a light conditioner that does not weigh down my hair, but still leaves it soft and manageable so I can pull it up at work if necessary, and when I drop it back down, it still looks good. I finally have movie star hair!

Well, almost.

Oh Look! A Contest:

Would you love to win a $100 Visa card and a year’s supply of Pantene? If so, leave me a comment below and tell me how much time do you spend dealing with hair issues daily and do you have any tips or tricks you can share - or you may leave a link to your post on your own blog in the comments below. The contest will begin at 9:00 a.m. (PST) July 1, 2009 and will end 5:00 p.m. (PST) August 1, 2009. Make sure that the e-mail address you leave is correct.
Rules:
• No duplicate comments.
• You may receive an additional entry by linking on twitter and leaving a link in the comments.
• You may receive an additional entry by blogging about this contest and leaving a link in the comments.
• This giveaway is open to US residents, aged 18 and over
• Winners will be selected via random draw, and will notified by e-mail.
• You have 48 hours to get back to me, otherwise a new winner will be selected.
• Please see the official rules here: Official Rules

Check out the rest of the BlogHer reviews for 8 additional chances to win!


UPDATE: We have a winner! Congratulations Heatherzilla. Check your email.

Like I need a reminder that they're not considered "diet" food

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

I love all things Cheese. We have a serious, long term relationship, Cheese and I. In fact, I have the same loving relationship with Cheese’s salty little adopted brother, Cheetos. So, you can imagine my delight when I was browsing the chips isle at the local supermarket and spotted this:



No one could ever accuse me of missing a chance to eat anything covered in Cheese. Especially not GIANT cheesy salty goodness covered Cheetos. I will admit it, I was excited to try the new GIANT Cheetos. I love all things Cheetos (well, except spicy hot burn your lips off and stain your fingers Cheetos. Those are kind of gross).

I brought my bag of GIANT cheesetastic goodness to work and mowed them all week long. Today, I was finishing off the bag and when I popped one of the final five GIANT Cheetos into my mouth, I had one of those gagging kind of what the hell did I just eat feelings. I looked into my bag because my GIANT Cheeto was wet. WET?!

My first thought was who has been drooling into my Cheetos bag? Upon closer inspection though (and by closer I mean dumping out the remaining four GIANT Cheetos onto a Kleenex on my desk and making a huge, crumby mess) I was greeted with what can only be described as gross. At least a tablespoon (YES, AN ENTIRE TABLESPOON) of clear looking oil. This oil had no smell or flavor. It was just pooled down there in the bottom of the bag, sopping up the extra Cheetos crumbs.

I’ll be honest. I grossed me out. My love of all things GIANT and cheesetastic is officially over now I’m afraid. I couldn’t bring myself to eat the remaining Cheetos. They were ruined for me.

My advice: They were good. They were Giant. They were Cheesetastic. However, they were also rolled in oil and dumped in a bag and that my friends, is gross.

Snuggle with me?

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

So, I'm minding my own business one day and I get an email with a coupon for the new Snuggle scents Sweet Almond and Jojoba and I had to try one because a) I had a coupon; b) it was on sale so with my coupon it only cost me a buck; c) if it sucked, I was only out a dollar; and d) I like the feel of extra super soft bedding and towels (especially now that it is pool season again).

Now, I will be honest. I have never been a big fan of fabric softeners. Usually they make me sneeze and it is never good to crawl into a freshly made bed and start sneezing your face off. Equally un-fun to grab a towel after a nice shower and immediately begin to sniffle and snort.

Imagine the torture of using fabric softener at work...

TECH TIP - if you work in an office with carpet and find that ya'll are shocking yourself on a regular basis, mix one part fabric softener and four parts water in a spray bottle. Spray it on the carpet monthly and work will be, quite literally, a less shocking place. This is helpful to avoid burning out a keyboard (been there, done that); shocking the boss when you had him/her the stack of freshly printed documents; and more importantly, your hair will not be constantly flying about in your face and eyes as you feverishly try to finish up that big project on Friday afternoon.

Don't thank me. I live to serve.

Because I am a trooper, I purchased my bottle of Sweet Almond Essence and headed home to do laundry.

I. Love. It.

Not only did I NOT sneeze my face off, the scent lingers in the air. My laundry room smells delicious. My bedroom and bathroom smell delicious. Even my stinky brother's bedroom has a clean, fresh scent to it. You have no idea what comfort that brings me since his room is directly across from the guest bathroom (which now smells equally wonderful).

In fact, my office now smells like Almonds and I have not shocked myself all week. But – don’t take my word for it. Go get your coupon and try it for yourself.

Would you redeem your ticket?

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

Sometimes lessons are right there in front of our faces yet for some reason, we choose not to see them. I often find myself clearly seeing where another person needs to make changes or alter their life course, yet, those same common sense rules or ideals don’t always apply to me. If you got a Golden Ticket that could change your life, would you redeem it?

I’m not unhappy with my life mind you. I’m just bored with it. I want change and I feel like waiting for it. That is partly why I went back to school, enrolling in the Masters courses. I will see direct results, I am working toward a goal and mostly, I am once again in control of my destiny. Sometimes, with the hustle and bustle of every day life, working the same job, same people, same projects, where we want to be gets lost in where we are. What we need to do to make a change gets lost in what we need to do to survive right now. There is always some obstacle or other thing that we think gets in our way or prevents us from doing what we want to do or need to do. It is similar, I think, to the craze for the Wii Fit game. Unlike exercising and dieting and waiting for a noticeable change or result, Wii Fit gives you immediate gratification and you can see a score or whatever it is that you see (I don’t have one, can you tell?)

The point is, we all want to see immediate results and we don’t necessarily want to work for change. Well, we don’t want to work really hard for change. I have no problem working hard or working toward a goal. I have a problem becoming discouraged with the bumps in the road and with not seeing results as soon as my mind thinks I should see them. Lately, I have been thinking more positively and once again I have grabbed the reins to where I want to be in my life. After all, I am the only one who can take me there.

This weekend, I read a book, Life’s Golden Ticket. I was hooked within the first three pages. I read it over two days. I passed it on to my 11 year old and when she is done, I’m going to send it to my best friend. Whether you are happy with your life and want confirmation or if you have some aspect you find dissatisfying and want to make a change, I recommend this book. It was a quick read, only 208 pages of a twisty, turning, gut wrenching journey of a man who doesn’t want to live the life he is living, he doesn’t want to lose the love of his life, and he doesn’t know half of what he thinks he does about life and loving someone else, and doesn't know how to change any of it. I read this book and saw some of me, some of my life, a whole lot of my brothers’ and sisters’ lives, some of my parents and some of my friends. We’ve all had a time in our lives where we’ve doubted, given up hope, wondered if we could survive and if we did, what would become of us and our lives. We have all settled at some point and then played the what if game. If you’ve ever even wondered for one millisecond what if, then read this book.

Fun in the desert

I received for my birthday back in October, a room at the Camelback Inn in Arizona. It was a gift from my boss complete with a dinner and a note that said "take a day off and relax."

She loves me.

I spent last Thursday at the Camelback Inn. It was a lovely hotel. The grounds were beautiful during the day and at night, around the restaurants, there were huge fire pits and lounging areas. It was very relaxing. Flowers everywhere lent to a beautiful scent in the air. Did I mention the spa? It was excellent! I some time in the hot tub, lounged in the eucalyptus infused sauna and then spent some time in the dry sauna. When I was done with that, I showered off in the private showers and waited for my one hour Swedish Massage (a Christmas gift from boss also). After the massage, I spent more time in the hot tub and finally went back to the room for a little nap while I waited for The Man to arrive.

I'll spare you the gory details of the rest of the evening but at one point I casually mentioned that we needed to win the lottery so that we could stay at nice hotels with full size towels and down comforters. The only down side to the night was no internet access. For $399 per night, I thought internet would be complementary. NOT. I had to pay $12.99 to complete a three paragraph assignment that was due and that I couldn't complete before Thursday night or after Friday at noon. (have I mentioned that sometimes professors are picky?) I won't go into detail about the $6.50 bottle of water or $12 nuts they offered on the counter in my room.

The next morning we woke up, checked out and went home to pack for a weekend in Vegas with the kids. The Man had three days off from work (over a weekend no less) and we were quick to capitalize on that. It was a last minute trip so I was doing it on a budget. I scored rooms at the Fiesta Henderson, a mere 12 miles from the Vegas strip. Staying on the strip costs anywhere from $160 up per night. I got a killer deal on our room at the Fiesta for a whopping $39 per night. SHE SHOOTS! SHE SCORES!

Upon arrival Friday night we put our bags away, hopped into the car and headed for the glittery strip. We trolled about for a couple hours, people watching and headed back to the room for some rest. The kids were tired and I had a school assignment to complete. (Another one of those picky professor assignments that must be done within a small window of time because some professors believe they own you the during of their course.)

So, upon getting back to the room, I fire up ye trusty ol' laptop and search for some internet access. I grabbed my purse for a couple Excedrin and wala! Internet hook up. FREE. (High Five!) I looked at The Man and said "we paid forty bucks a night for this place and it comes with complementary internet AND full size towels? Maybe we don't need to win the lottery."

The weekend proceeded with food, virgin daiquiris, laughter, fright and delight of roller coaster rides and much people watching. By Sunday morning, we were ready to check out and come back home. Upon checkout I noticed a charge on our hotel bill of $8.95 per day for "guest services." Complimentary internet my ass.

Consensus: it doesn't matter where you stay, you pay for everything. Period. Both rooms were nice. Both served our needs, a safe, warm place to sleep that didn't come with livestock. Both and running water and working plumbing. Food was cheaper at the Fiesta which is to be expected because a) it is not a resort like the Camelback and b) it is off the strip where everything costs way too much. I spent $109 on four hamburgers, 1 grilled cheese and five cokes at Cesar's Palace once. We don't eat there anymore.

The makers of Excedrin pulled a fast one

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

vs

I am a tool and the makers of Excedrin can kiss my ass. Don't get me wrong. Excedrin is a rocking headache medicine. It does take away my headaches including some of my milder migraines which makes my prescription meds last that much longer.

However, I have been paying extra for YEARS, years people! I have paid extra for the Excedrin Migraine because they really work and they work fast, only to find out they are the exact same product as Extra Strength Excedrin.

If I won the lottery, this would probably not mean anything to me because money would be no issue. However, since I live in the real world, where I work and work hard for my money, budget is a word I am quite familiar with.

I have drastically cut back on certain household and grocery items like brand named items and I have been really paying attention to see where else I could shave off a few dollars. Every dollar counts right?

So, I need Excedrin the other day and Extra Strength is on sale, buy one, get one free. That is a screaming deal normally. I buy Excedrin Migraine because of the combination of Acetaminophen, Aspirin and caffeine which work together to kick butt on headaches. I grabbed a box of Extra Strength Excedrin and guess what? It has the same active ingredients!

So, for years and years and years, I have paid on average an extra two or three dollars a bottle for the Migraine product when in fact, I could have been paying much less FOR THE SAME DAMN THING called "Extra Strength." I supposed the inactive ingredients MIGHT be different, but if you look at the box, you will see the active ingredients are the exact same for Extra Strength and Migraine products. 250 mg of Acetaminophen, 250 mg Aspirin adn 65 mg of caffeine. The only difference I see is one is packaged in a pretty green box and the other is a pretty red box.

I'm pissed. I won't lie. I feel I've been duped by a product I used to trust.

Valley Fresh Steamers

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

Yesterday while doing my grocery shopping, I was perusing the frozen food isle, looking for anything that might be different from the ordinary stuff I cook around here. I tried some Stauffer's Chicken Enchiladas one night because we were in a hurry and it was basically a frozen meal in a pan. Can you say GROSS? Disgusting? I'd rather eat dry rice cakes while walking through the Sahara desert looking for water. Seriously.

While debating on a frozen pizza for parent/teacher night, I saw the Green Giant Valley Fresh Steamers. There were a couple kinds but I opted for the Broccoli, Carrots, Cauliflower & Cheese Sauce. The package claims it is 45 calories per serving (YES!) and low in fat (double YES!)

I followed the simple directions on the back of the bag: DO NOT TEAR OR CUT BAG! Microwave on high for 5 to 7 ½ minutes (I went 8 minutes just to be on the safe side). Let stand one minute. Tear bag at notch and empty into serving dish.

Two things jumped out at me. First, the big red tabs on either side of the bag that say “CAUTION: HOT STEAM.” I have experienced Caution: Hot Steam before and it isn’t pretty. Not at all. I seem to recall it hurt like hell too and required many nights of not doing my own dishes before it healed. Yes, I remember. I do.

So, after letting the bag stand for one minute, I carefully grabbed and tried to tear where it says TEAR HERE which happens to be just below the CAUTION: HOT STEAM tabs. Now, grabbing the bag from the bottom was not possible because that is where all the freshly steamed hot cheesy vegetables were. I couldn’t even hold it in my hand there. I tried to hold the top between the CAUTION: HOT STEAM tabs while tearing on the TEAR HERE pre-cut notch and that wasn’t working either. I had to hold the bag by the CAUTION: HOT STEAM tab, while tearing at the TEAR HERE notch. The CAUTION: HOT STEAM area actually has HOT STEAM coming out!!!! Aside from being hot, it was also wet, making my hand slip. I have two different spots on my left hand that had just enough CAUTION: HOT STEAM to understand they didn’t want to grip there any more.

When I finally wised up and got out the scissors, I poured said Valley Fresh Steamers into my serving bowl. I wasn’t disappointed. I just wasn’t really impressed either.

Now, the vegetables seemed to be small, dwarf like veggies. The cheese, looking more like an orange sauce than cheese. The taste? Meh.

Would I buy them again? Yes and this is why: I’ve tried frozen veggies with cheese sauce before and one of two things happens. Either the water from the frozen veggie creates a cheese soupy consistency or the veggies are mushy and gross and mostly the stem of the broccoli or cauliflower. This was not the case here. The veggies were still crisp, the cheese, while not really melted cheese like I wanted, it wasn’t a watery, soupy grossness either. Most of all, I would buy this because there were florets on the broccoli and cauliflower and because the dramas actually ate it and asked for seconds. I cannot pass up food that has that effect.

Macaroni Grill Dinner in a Box

Because I work full time and have an hour commute one way on a good day, I’m always looking for good food I can throw together quickly. As it is now, I get home between 6:15 and 6:30 p.m. and by the time I cook dinner, it’s usually around 8:00 p.m. before we’re done eating and we can start homework or relax for a minute.

About a month ago, I was shopping and came across this:

Romano’s Macaroni Grill Creamy Basil Parmesan Chicken & Pasta. I thought what the heck, I’ll try it out. I usually shy away from meals in a box because years ago, we ate a lot of a certain beef helper in a box. A Whole Lot of it. So much so that the thought of it now makes me gag just a little.

Anyway, one day I was running late and when I got home, my youngest daughter wanted chicken alfredo for dinner. I had chicken, just no alfredo. As I was searching the pantry for something I could throw together quickly, I remembered the Macaroni Grill stuff. I pulled it out and read the box. 1 pound raw chicken. Check. 2 tablespoons butter. Check. ¾ cup milk. Check.

I didn’t add any extra spices like I normally would (except I did spice up my chicken as I cooked it because there is something so wrong to me when I see raw, naked meat in a pan without anything good sticking to it like garlic or pepper or Italian seasoning). Once the chicken was done, I added the milk and seasonings and simmered away:

While the noodles were boiling I threw together a quick salad and tossed some frozen garlic bread in the oven. Dinner was done in under 30 minutes and OMG was it good.

Romano’s Macaroni Grill is my second favorite restaurant (and they would be my first if they offered salad WITH the meal instead of for an extra five bucks) and this food was damn near restaurant quality. I usually find home box meals to be bland and if I cook them again, I add seasonings and whatnot. However, the only thing I’d change with this particular meal would be to add a little more garlic and let it simmer a bit longer to get the seasonings really meshing. Otherwise, I have no complaints and I would recommend this meal if you’re looking for something under 30 minutes that is NOT hot dogs and macaroni & cheese.

Soft v. Strong

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

I haven’t reviewed anything in a while and I’m bored so I thought it was about time I enlighten you as to the type of toilet paper we use at the U2BM house. I know. This is HUGE.

You see, while the rest of the world is worrying about who they should vote for, the state of the economy, whether oral sex is really sex or who shot J.R., I am here, thinking about you my dear, loyal, loving readers. Because you are all that matters to me right now (The Man is at work, the kids are in bed, there is nothing on TV).

Now, let me preface this with the fact that I never really thought there was a difference as far as TP went. I mean, when you put it on the roll, as long as the free flap is on the outside so you can find it in the middle of the night, and as long is it’s soft, absorbent and not colored or scented, who really cares. Right? Me? I usually bought what was on sale. All that changed however, when I met my soon to be husband.

He came with some baggage such as an ex-wife, three year old daughter, expensive hobbies and a demand for a certain kind of TP. None of that el-cheapo stuff he said. He didn’t want sand paper on his ass. When he wipes, he wants something that will do the job without leaving him the need to soak in a hot bath. I just wanted something that wouldn’t leave pee on my hand.

So for years, we have used Charmin. I don’t remember exactly when, but at some point it became Charmin Ultra Soft. All I can say with certainty is that we’ve always used the RED Charmin. Me: “What kind of TP is it?” Him: “RED. Make sure you buy the RED one.” Got it.

That would be Charmin Ultra Strong.

Years went buy. We were loyal. We only used the Red one. Then one day, I was at the store and there was no Red Charmin. There was however, Blue Charmin. So I bought it.

Charmin Ultra Soft.

And we used it. And that husband of mine loovvvveeeddd it. Said it was The Best Toilet Paper he’d ever had and please, continue buying it. He asked me a the dinner table. He asked me while I was in the shower. He called me at work and said “don’t forget TP at the store. Get the Blue stuff.”

The problem was, I wasn’t in love with Blue Charmin. I had issues with the Blue stuff. Don’t get me wrong. It is soft. Like, I could put a pillow case on the package and use it for a pillow, soft. That wasn’t a problem. It was 2 ply and that was good. I never felt leakage. I liked that. It felt really, really nice (and SOFT) on my nether regions. The problem was that it tends to, oh, I don’t know how to put it, shred? Roll up? Come apart while wiping? Leave a trail? Now, I’m not a vigorous wiper or anything but I noticed little white linty type remnants down there. I did not like it. Not One Little Bit.

I thought perhaps it was the batch so I went ahead and bought it again. Same thing. I bought the Red stuff again and guess what? No rolling. No shredding. No leftovers. That is what I want in a TP.

I want something stealth. Something that cleans up then goes away quietly without leaving a trace that it’s been there. That my friends, is why we use Charmin Ultra Strong. It’s the RED one.


(This is NOT a paid review. It is however a sad look into my boring life.)

Dawn Foam. I love it. That's all you need to know.

The below mentioned product(s) was/were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

Many moons ago, way before Christmas (or perhaps shortly thereafter) I got a free sample of Dawn direct foam dish washing soap. I will admit it, I’m a brand whore. I only use the brand I like and trust, and rarely if ever do I deviate from that. I’ve been using Dawn dish soap since I was a teenager. My mom use to buy this crap that was blue, came in a tall bottle with a plain white label that said “grease cutting dish soap.” Liars. I actually saved my money and bought Dawn because dishes were my job. We had seven kids in the house. That meant a lot of dishes. The last thing my teenage self wanted to do was re-wash all the dishes because they were greasy. I learned and I learned early. Spending two dollars of my own money was totally worth not rewashing every dish in the house. Period.

Now, here I am inching up on my forties and I still use Dawn. When I was saw the sample offer, I was hesitant. I mean, I have a dishwasher and I use that with my Cascade/Dawn dishwasher tablet thingamabobs that clean so well I just pink puffy heart them. But, I still do hand wash occasionally. If there are only three dishes. If the dishwasher is full because I’ve prepared yet another feast for the extended family, etc.

I received a regular sized bottle of the new Dawn Foam. I gave one pump on my dish sponge and went to town. I cleaned my sinks, ALL counters, my stove and washed the front of the refrigerator and stove with that one pump on my little ol’ dish sponge. I was almost hooked. The true test would be cleaning my pots and pans. I’m one of those old fashioned cooks who uses real butter and olive oil and occasionally fries things. I make right good messes when I cook. The next night would be the true test of my new Dawn. I was making spaghetti.

After dinner, I had one heck of a mess to clean up. A big pot from the sauce, a fry pan from the Italian sausage, another pan for the noodles. My stove looked like a murder scene from all the saucy bubbles and spoon stirs, etc. I loaded the dishwasher, wiped down the table, and grabbed the noodle pan. I pumped one squirt of soap onto my trusty sponge, rolled up my sleeves and got busy. The noodle pan was easy washing I mean, it was just boiled water and noodles. I grabbed the fry pan. Still using my one pump of soap and washed that pan out lickity split. Not a drip of grease to be seen. I was surprised that my soapy sponge was holding up. The bottle says one pump will do a whole sink load of dishes. I was about to test that theory. My daughters handed me two glasses. I washed them and guess what? Not a greasy streak anywhere. I grabbed my sauce pan and cleaned it up and moved over to the stove. I thought for sure my little sponge didn’t have enough soap to finish the job but I was wrong. So wrong in fact that once my stove was sparkling clean again, my microwave shiny like new, I wiped down all the counters, refrigerator and still had to rinse my sponge out seven or eight times to get all the soap out.

Dawn, you’ve impressed me. And I’m pessimistic.

I urge all of you to go out and drop the two bucks it will cost and become believers yourself. It is August and I just had to buy my new bottle of Dawn Foam. Not only does it clean like no other, I use less than I did of my old squirty soap and it washes more surface and dishes without having to fill a sink full of water (which totally grosses me out to wash dishes in dirty water).

Go here to get coupons!

Mr. Clean with Febreze. Ahhh

The below mentioned product(s) was/were given to me at no charge for review. I am not being monetarily paid for this review (other than receipt of the free product). I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product(s).

I am quite particular with regard to the products I use to clean my house. This is mainly due to my allergies. I have been using Bounce Febreze scent since it came out. I can do laundry without sneezing my face off. I would totally kiss the feet of whomever invented Swiffer Dusters. For the first time in my life, I can actually dust my house without sneezing my head off for two hours. When the Swiffer gods decided to put Febreze scent in the duster, I was borderline orgasmic. I’m serious.

Imagine my surprise however, when they added the scent of Febreze to my old boyfriend, Mr. Clean. Now, I was apprehensive at first. I mean, I like the smell of Mr. Clean original. It just smelled so, clean. But, as I am often reminded by my family, it doesn’t hurt to try new things.

I put on my cleaning gloves (a girl’s gotta protect her nails ya know) and I pulled my hair back. I took a deep breath and sprayed. I was impressed. I didn’t sneeze once. And, from what I could tell, there was no difference in the way my new, smellier, refreshing Mr. Clean actually cleaned my house. It still cut the grease and left my stove and fridge streak free. What surprised me however, when all was said and done, was that after I was done cleaning, my house smelled clean. However, it didn’t smell chemical or ammonia clean. Instead, it smelled clean AND refreshing.

Next time my Mother in Law shows up, she will never know, and I will not have to hear about the fact, that I just cleaned the whole house.

The Shout House - Westgate City Center, AZ

For the first time in years, we went to a bar. We being The Man and I. It was a friend’s birthday and his wife wanted us to meet them at a local sports bar to play some pool or darts. Since The Man stopped drinking all those years ago, he is not EVER keen on the idea of going to a bar. Any bar. Even if they serve food. I know and respect this and I don’t pressure or pout. Hell, most of the time, I don’t even ask if we will go when we’re invited. However, this time, something felt different so I went ahead and asked. I’m glad I did.

We ended up not going to the sports bar. Instead, we went to a place called The Shout House. It is located next to Jimmy Buffett’s Margaritaville at Westgage City Center. Westgate sits between the Jobing.com arena and the University of Phoenix Stadium (think of the 2008 Super Bowl).

At first I wasn’t sure what to expect. The nightclub is a 21 years and older club whose claim to fame appears to be dueling pianos and while I was intrigued and even a little giddy at the prospect, I wasn’t sure how The Man would take it. He dislikes all things not Rock and Roll or Country. He is not a fan of live music. Let alone piano music. I had the feeling our stay would be short and right along the lines of “making an appearance to be nice.”

I was wrong.

We walked in and saw the stage. A relatively large stage with two grand pianos that face each other. The wall behind the stage was floor to ceiling mirror. The mirror was slightly tilted so the audience could have a better view of the players. There were two fully stocked bars serving mixed drinks and beer and something called the Big Ass Beer (since The Man and I don’t drink, we didn’t know exactly how big the Big Ass Beer really was.) However, I bought a round for the birthday boy, which consisted of a Southern Comfort and Coke, a Coors Light and two plain cokes for The Man and I. It cost a whopping $10.

There were four rotating piano players the night we were there but when I quizzed the door man, I found out they have seven players who not only play piano, they also rotate playing drums and bass. They play and sing all range of music from rap to country to hip/hop and rock and roll. They also tell some pretty funny jokes and sing some rather racy songs as the night wears on.

At one point (okay, three points which appeared to be the top of the hours), the servers and bartenders jump onstage (and on the bar) and perform routines. When we got there they were doing a routine from the Rocky Horror Picture Show and as the night wore on, they performed to Roller Coaster (of Love) and Macho Man (wherein the men and women grab their own crotch in a Michael Jackson-esq lift and pull). The men took of their shirts and I was not complaining. At. All.

While we were there, the audience sang along, was included in many songs, joked with the players and were brought onstage for birthday wishes, bachelor parties, and other forms of embarrassment. The cover charge was minimal and the food/drinks was totally reasonable.

All in all, I really enjoyed the experience. It was not a rowdy bar and it did not seem like the typical “meat market” that I’ve been to in the past. The age range of customers was from college aged kids to middle age all the way up to a older (meaning 50+) couples. The Shout House has a full bar as well as a menu with food such as pizza, hamburgers and sandwiches, salads and appetizers.

Most shocking of all, The Man agreed it would be fun to go back for dinner and sit around and watch the show! I almost fell over.

Trojan Extended Pleasure

The below mentioned product was purchased by me for my personal use. I am not being monetarily paid for this review. I will give my honest opinion and thoughts regarding said product anyway.

Remember the old tips on pleasing your man including put in a Halls Cough drop before you go south and it will make him squirm? Or I heard the same thing with an Altoid mint. Then I heard that he could do the same thing for a woman. I tried the Halls trick. It burned like hell. My husband liked to remind me of this precious moment in time occasionally. But it is all in good fun because I remind him of the time we were going at it and the dog licked his butt. It’s all good in our house. So, when I said I was going to blog about Trojan Condoms, my husband didn’t bat an eye.

There are certain things that you do to please your partner. There are things you try and things you discuss and things that make you both laugh. I was surprised when my husband first approached me and asked if I was satisfied. Of course I am satisfied. One doesn’t stay married for fifteen plus years as an unsatisfied woman, unless she is my mother, but that is another entry for another day.

Upon some prodding and poking around, my husband finally spilled his guts. He was considering Viagra. He thought it may help in the longevity department. I didn’t even realize it was an issue. I suggested we explore our options. A few nights later, he came home with some condoms and a proposal.

Now, I'm always game for a proposal from the man I love, especially when it involves certain items like, naked laundry, kisses in front of the kids and then they run from the room crying “ewwwww,” or condoms.

Once the kids were in bed, we set about playing around investigating his new item.

To be fair, we did try the Trojan Extended Pleasure condoms out more than once. These condoms contain a “Climax Control Lubricant-Clear odorless lubricant with special additive to help prevent premature ejaculation and help provide greater staying power.”

In fact, we’re on our second box! However, the first time we used them, they didn’t really seem to make a difference in his longevity. Seems that the man should put the condom on for a few minutes before the act in order for the lubricant to start its magic.

The second time we used them, well, he certainly lasted longer than he did the first time. But, and that is a big BUT there must have been a leak of some sort because as we were right in the middle of “the act” I suddenly felt weird. Like, numb weird. I thought that my parts simply weren’t used the work out they had just received. *blush*

However, the next time we used them, the same thing happened. Finally I realized what was happening. Whatever those scientists at Trojan use to “control the climax” is really much like the numbing agent that a dentist uses on your gums. It numbs the skin. Apparently, what I had always heard as a rumor (rub some Orajel down there, wait a few minutes, then proceed to the act, and supposedly the man will last longer) has some small amount of truth to it because I got a little of that agent used in the condoms on my lip and sure enough, I felt like I had rubbed Orajel on it.

Anyway, my unsolicited review of this product is a total thumbs up. If you and your partner are having longevity issues, or EE (early ejaculation) I think these might actually help and even if they don’t, it is fun trying right!