I don't know who wrote it, but it makes me laugh

Dear Tide: 

I’m writing to say what an excellent product you have! I’ve used it all through my married life, as my Mom always told me it was the best. Now that I am in my fifties, I find it even better! In fact, about a month ago, I spilled some red wine on my new white blouse. My inconsiderate and uncaring husband started to berate me about how clumsy I was, and generally started becoming a pain in the ass. One thing led to another and somehow I ended up with a lot of his blood on my white blouse. I tried to get the stain out using a bargain detergent, but it just wouldn’t come out. 

After a quick trip to the supermarket, I purchased a bottle of liquid Tide with bleach alternative, and to my surprise and satisfaction, all of the stains came out! 

In fact, the stains came out so well the Detectives who came by yesterday told me that the DNA tests on my blouse were negative. Then my attorney called and said that I would no longer be considered a suspect in the disappearance of my husband. What a relief! Going through menopause is bad enough without being a murder suspect!

I thank you, once again, for having such a great product. Well, gotta go. I have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people. 

Author Unknown

Wordless Wednesday

Some people are like Slinkies. They’re really good for nothing. But they still bring a smile to your face when you push them down a flight of stairs. Author Unknown

Wordless Wednesday

Send some flowers, just because

I am a big fan of sending flowers and plants to people. And not just for Birthday or Mother’s Day. I like to send the just for every day, a little, Hey, I’m thinking of you today gift. I also like to send them in lieu of a good job or congratulations. I also don’t favor one sex over the other when I send them. I sent my husband six red roses after our first date. To the tire shop where he worked as a recapper. Did he get a lot of ribbing? Yes. Did he call me that night? Yes. Did he ever leave? So far, nearly 18 years later, no he has not. Because flowers are a universal language. The key is getting them from a decent place. Like Serenata florist delivery so they aren’t all wilted or ugly when they arrive.

The other key to successful flower sending is to make sure you know how to properly care for the flowers and/or plant. Because if you don’t know how to take care of them, they will not live as long and stay as beautiful. So there you go. Flowers 101. Now, go send a bouquet to someone you like. Or care about. Or love. And do it just because you can. It will brighten their day. And yours too.